the best days in LIFE are when you realize you arent pregnant
I'm not 100% on this, but I'm pretty sure I just accidently talked my way into a threesome.
She told me I had to leave by four. We fucked until six thirty and we are the champions played on the way home. Yeah god knew
I'm at about main and main street
Nothing says never again like hurling in the shower.
Their engagement party consisted of them doing shots, yelling at each other, leaving for 30 minutes, and coming back with smiles.
I'd say they're off to a great start!
I blew him while he was standing up and he drooled on my head
He put himself in the friend zone by calling me dude all night so I blew his friend. Judge me.
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
It's tough not drinking when the bartender adds rum to your coke without telling you, and doesn't charge you
Haha he's lucky I don't kick him back into the land of the majestic handjobs
Just read 119 best sex positions. I wanna try 107 of them. Can I put you down for 50?
Shouting "one vagina to rule them all" was probably not the best way to meet our best mates fiance
We had sex on a dog bed..
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
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