put your party hat on. and by party hat I mean no panties
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Stripper fight on main stage. It just happened. And it was glorious.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
If your dick isn't up when i get home you're catching tonight.
That's because you're a slut. A slut fucking a fence.
Weer fine. went to buiy cigxs, but hes theonly one waering shoes. He caem out wti chicke fingers instead. whatecer, there th 8 dollar kind.
I hope it's socially acceptable to wear a mesh one piece into last call tonight?
If I was 5 years younger and single...
She STILL wouldn't fuck you.
Hey guys guess what I found in my bed this morning? I wish it was a man..but it was a potato
my human sexuality class is the only class where the porn i watch the night before is relevant to the discussion the next day
Showed up to family party blacked out and in a turkey costume. I'd say thanksgiving was a success.
I know it's going to be a good day because he didn't notice the bite mark on my butt.
1. Everyone on the 1st and 3rd floor heard you. 2. The 3rd floor vibrates when we have sex. 3. The 1st floor can hear the bed squeak.
Wow you are like a taller more attractive sex Yoda.
Randomize
