I don't think anyone could emotionally handle a numb vagina.
I am only moving my arms so I remember that I can. These brownies are wild.
Why is it only times like these when I'm scrubbing the cum stains off my futon before my family gets here that I seriously begin to question my life choices?
About six hours after the bottle of smirnoff, I was googling "losing your stomach lining" and calling my mom for help. She has experience.
She kept talking about how amazing the banana she had yesterday was. Don't know if it was innuendo, stoned, or just a really amazing banana.
no dude I'm not doing anything bad to her...remember she's always the DD she has blackmail material on literally all of us
I thought it was a myth but I have just reached the age of sitting on my balls. Not a fan.
I just googled, "how to do boob makeup" thats the kind of night I wanna have.
But once you explained how to fill cupcakes with semen I realize you were harmless and right on my level.
My mom wants to know what to send you in a care package. She used cat emojis, so you know it's serious
Getting high in the car with mom and the aunts during intermission for drag queen bingo. Details later.
I'd call the fact I ended up in my own bed a huge success
Dick is healthier for you than green beans
I apologize for there being a shopping cart in the living room. I don't know how why or where i got it.
Ooooh no. Jesus take the wheel, or Moses. SOMEBODY TAKE THE WHEEL
Randomize
