How long until YT realizes that it's a man?
Passed out on a playground for a while before trying to break into the elementary school. Erica thought her captain tasted like cat food, so she poured her bottle into her cat's dish and proceeded to eat it like cereal.
You win. Erica always eats cat food.
Oh i know my limit. 9 shots after i've given blood.
if you spike my cofee one more time im gona fuck you up. im presenting to the mayor in sevven fucking minuets. fuck you and youir fucking bartending classses i am so fuckign fcked
The jerky fairy visited my fridge. It's glorious.
Im laying on the couch wishing someone was here to pour wine in my mouth. I need an alcohol IV
I overcharge people for their weed so you can have yours for free, because I care
It was the hardest I ever came in my life and once I could see straight again I just looked at him and said "cool"
Hey guys so who is Justin McGoo and why did I text him "fuck yooooouuu juuuustiiin mcgooo" at 12:06am on Thursday night?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
You have to just make a conscious effort not to make out with people when he's around if you want to keep him in your life?
Don't get mad but There's blood everywhere and the only thing I remember is the bj from your cousin.
dude wtf why are there forks in my wall
does "I AM MAGNETOOOO" ring any bells, because that was you for an entire hour last night
Do not confuse my plans for being an adult though. I will ABSOLUTELY be practicing suturing, on my porch, while getting stoned.
Have you ever realized how weird it is to think that you've fucked someone and don't know what their handwriting looks like?
Randomize
