If it makes you feel better, you're better at taking it in than ass than she is...
Well...yeah actually, that does make me feel better
and after you realized your puke was bright blue, you started crying hysterically and screaming, "I DON'T WANT TO BE A SMURF!" no more uv blue for you.
I mean, he was my book buddy in 1st grade. The kid taught me how to read, the least I could do was give him head.
we ate a 40 pack of string cheese and watched an entire washing machine cycle.
still wasted. at home depot . just threw up in one of the demo showers. not okay.
He looks like he has a penis
What the fuck
A good one, a good penis
making an indian outfit so we can be pochohantas and john smith and fuck in the canoe on the night float
I can't. I will literally throw up my liver
Why dont you be an ebola patient for halloween? You can totally throw up and itll be part of your costume.
Just did a relay race involving shotgunning beers, cannonballs and riding a blowup whale. Never want to leave vacation.
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
We're going as conductors of the hot mess train and nobody rides for free
Our tip jar will say "just put the tip in, see how it feels"
NO MAKING MOLDS OF ANYONES GENITALS
Fine. Suck all the fun out of life.
We should just do therapy together, clearly we have all the same issues. It's why we are friends.
my goal is to never have a bac of 0.0 the whole time while in the state of florida, which means i have to chug a beer before i cross the state line
Update: my mom just told someone to shut up and suck her dick
Randomize
