But honestly u used to be a cool guy and lately uve been superame(734): Superlame
honestly, who buys weed with an unemployment check?
you.
oh yeah. preciate
Seriously? Do you have me saved in your phone as 'check every 3 months to see if she's single yet'?
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Im watching hello kitty on qvc debating if its a good idea to cook bagel bites on my space heater
You can't keep basing your relationship off of the fact that you both love ramen noodles
I thought of you while cleaning the forehead prints off my glass doors.
Dipping doritos in ranch. Why doesn't he love me?
They evidently had to pull his penis out of me while we were passed out on the floor.
Ok fuckface listen up and listen good. 1.calling dibs on a chick out of your league is like applying for a job with a highlight video 2. dont fucking ski down the stairs again 3. if you do, put it on your highlight video
Found the puke drawer
I totally OverDed on K2 last night. I felt like I was made of lead and then I had a panic attack.
So I'm sitting here baked on a bridge thinking about how plants think, I miss you so much
I just wish he'd leave so I can vomit in peace.
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
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