I can't get in trouble, i'm smoking a bong in the office right now
There was a fist fight in my basement last night at four in the morning, in case you were wondering
i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
You came into my room at 3am.. drunk.. and asked to do spanish homework together. Props for being a good student.
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
i think i made a good impression on his friends wen i survived 55 cup beer pong
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Seriously, webMD this shit for me, I cant move and I dont wanna die until I have something worth fighting over in my will
Please don't pee your pants in the cab. One more time, and im pretty sure the cab companies will refuse to pick you up anymore
Was so close to hoppin on it but then I realize it's not a dick and I needed to keep walking. Primal instincts.
Mostly what I remember is someone saying "raise your hand if you're too turnt" then raising my hand and falling
He just sprayed AXE in his mouth to get rid of his bad breath... THAT DRUNK
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
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