I FOUND THE PROF I'M GOING TO FUCKKKK.
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
Can you check your dirty laundry bag for my tooth.
dude she was givin me head and stops and looks up at me and tells me she loves me, then goes ''alright now cum in my mouth''.... pretty sure shes the one
No just sleep deprived. James woke me up at 7 and forced me to eat a hot pocket with him cause he " didn't want me to die".
THERE IS A WINE CUBE IN MY ASS THIS IS NOT GOING AS PLANNED
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
three guys with a tattoo of the Walmart rollback smiley holding up a middle finger on their ass=free drinks in every bar
Definitely! I will do that this week. Right now, watching drag queens play with my dad's beard.
I'm in the ER bruh, I went skinny dipping last night and a cat fish bit my dick.
Yeah you'd pretty much be ruined if you broke up with a guy like that and then had to return to the dating pool
My weirdest encounter with a stranger though was when for some reason they just gave me a box of unopened socks. Needless to say, I never used them.
We decorated the tree, drank wine, and he went down on me with Christmas music on in the background. Christmas IS coming.
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
I called him Oliver all night
His name is Brandon
Dude... Those don't even start with the same letter...
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