she says it's "been amazing lately"
i think basically because i hate her so much i'm trying to break her in half
So this girl in my math class just went to the bathroom, tampon in hand, comes back with it still in her hand starts digging around in her purse, takes her thing of birthcontrol out, goes oh fuck, and downs the rest of the pills. Got to love college.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
In retrospect pumpkin carving while drinking Patron was a bad idea.
i mad aa ber float. budweiser nd ice creem. it amzig.
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
at first i was on the bathroom floor cuz i was hungover. now im just here because it is cool
so my pro life roomate found a used condom wrapped up in her sheets with your panties. never letting you have sex in her bed again
You were wearing a cookie monster onesie and telling everyone you were actually the sausage monster..
On the bright side I still got laid
I was fed cake in bed and then was pinned down and ridden till I came. And then fed more cake. I'm going to marry Brad. I'll put money on it.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I am so horny. It's like all the stress of finals week has relocated to my vagina.
oh, he’s out of jail btw. as of about 6pm. one of his customers bonded him out apparently lol
Like he really got a coke fiend to bond him out?
There is no way entering a gas station bathroom memorializing an alien abduction in rural New Hampshire is a good idea.
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