i've decided that sluttiness is like a disease, it can lay dormant in you for years and then one day you go to college and with all the booze and drugs and boys and time on your hands symptoms begin to show then one day BAM you're a huge slut. it's like how izzie had skin cancer and it grew into brain cancer.
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
Are you pooping in the stall next to me?
Maybe....
Cause I just heard a fart and it sounded like one of your farts.
we were so high last night we were cutting bread with my iphone
He's drinking red wine in a margarita glass. He couldn't be more perfect for me.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
HOLY SHIT HE'S TRYING TO EAT HIS FOOT. THIS IS THE BEST DAY OF MY LIFE.
this hospital has no fireball
how does spending your day off taking me to the hospital sound?
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
I think his dick was bigger than his dog
I would literally only have sex with a dinosaur right now.
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
I'm in love. Her name is Jamie. She's beautiful. She punched me in the face.
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