We gave a starfish gin and Lucky Charms. I think it enjoyed it. Best trip to the beach ever.
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
I found your bra. How you get it off the satellite dish is your problem.
I gotta find new tactics tho. There's just so many tied up dicks one can look at before part of your soul dies.
Nothing quite like coming out of an alcohol induced blackout walking down Spruill Avenue carrying a silver briefcase full of IT tools you don't know where they came from. This is my life.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I just did a jell-o shot with my grandmother. I can die now..
Well yeah. Plus. My dick looks awful. So I would need to do some extreme makeover dick edition before even starting something so ridiculous.
Sex was great. Left his house while he was asleep but on the plus side I was able to get gas station food.
I started the day with dreams of getting laid and ended it with the reality of eating Taco Bell in my bed with my dog.
He had a cruise ship of a dick and I need to set sail on that ocean again
I'm tired, but I'm gonna go with "I watched the debate last night and part of my soul died"
there's a 50/50 chance the night will end in alcohol-induced rituals of satanic nature
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
I woke up this morning and had to retrieve my clothes from the flagpole, they were using my boxers as a makeshift rally flag for drinking. Yeah last night was a success.
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