If I was on drugs, this would be amazing
so last night after we hooked up i got my period and woke up this morning with a blood stain on his bed and not only was it huge but i had put my jeans back on before bed so i took the walk of shame with period stained pants
I'm gonna need you to NOT let me play duck duck goose with three racoons in the middle of the street next time.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
just peed on the 7/11 floor and casually left. Omg so drunk
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
Just found a bag of weed nailed to the door that my dealer dropped off since I wasn't home. God I love Boulder.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
I had an epiphany. If a dude dressed up as Batman to ask me out, I'd prolly marry him.
i feel like i am made of mashed potatoes. i love cannabis pills so. fucking. much.
I think if my mom ever finds out about my nipple piercings I'll just be like "mom, tbh it's a sex thing"
I told him to send me a dick snap for my birthday. To personalize it, he drew a candle coming out of the tip of it so I could blow it out.
I went from swearing off of sex to planning a threesome. It's been a rollercoaster of a day.
I was walking out of the bar when he said I'll see you later and I said I'll see you in my dreams and then fell face first and broke my nose
Randomize
