SEEEEXXX PLEASE
Its official, cigarettes are now more expensive than weed
there is cereal in my wallet where all the cash used to be.
If I had a nickel for every time my parents threatened to stop paying tuition I would be a very rich man. Rich enough to pay my own tuition.
mid puke you looked up at me and asked if it was your turn to sing
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
the $20 limit for secret santa doesn't apply to me cause you know a half gram of coke is more than $20
he went to have surgery in the morning and apparently they found lip gloss on his dick
The other. Cat spoke to me and left. This shit is laced
The first cat might save me but they are taking out masks
I would watch the shit out of some full house right now.
hungover waitressing a bar association event. im being judged by actual judges.
In her drunkenness, she packed a bag with tequila, two shot glasses, salt, a knife, and two pears. She was prepared but too high to distinguish pears from limes.
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I dont know it just seems wrong to fuck her on my exes back porch
Randomize
