his logic is that since hes already cheated on her w me its doesnt count
If there was a creeper hall of fame you and me would be the first two inductees
I just realized his fb pic was taken in a public bathroom.
You never go ass to mouth. That's quite possibly the most important rule Paramedic school has taught me.
Being a slut is okay if you're being a polite slut, right?
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
Put a customer on hold today while I threw up. If I don't get employee of the month, I'm suing.
Also, drinking coors light. Fuck that. Fuck that in the fucking face.
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I can't handle dick pics with conversational captions
I just folded my boss's lingerie. I need a drink and a raise
You think you're smart. You're pretending to be asleep to save yourself from my hormonal pms mood swings. Unfortunately that only works against bears.
How much weed should I buy my mom for her birthday?
Your aunt just offered to blow me for a ride home....how did you end up such a prude?
I fucked that choir dude last night. he had the most strangely musical moans. it was like a Sound Of Music porno.
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