i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
the only reason why im excited to go home for break is to finally eat real fucking food and have normal bowel movements.
I know we didn't hook up because i was still wearing my fanny pack in the morning
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
I think i blacked out...but i remember licking your teeth
I'm a little upset you wasted 3 beers on your wet tee shirt contest.
she tried to douche with champagne. in front of all of us. unabashedly.
Just had a 10 minute long conversation with my cat about how if I died, and he needed to eat me to live, I'd totally be ok with it. Definitely still drunk.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
I apologized for the whole SWAT team incident to the roommate.
He deadlifted me and I came just a little at the apex
Well, I was asked to leave the Waffle House for "being to physical" so I think that option is off the table
I walked in and found you petting your fish outside the bowl, you said its fine, you do this all the Time.
My vagina has made plenty life decisions and I would like to point out very few if not any of them were in my favor.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
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