Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
i was so high i thought his mole came off and was flying around
the semester is winding down: time to procrastinate by googling cheap keg options
There's 12 honey baked hams in my fridge. I vaguely recalled you organizing a "Midnight Ham Run."
Then they all walked away with the drinks I bought them, and the fat one slapped me in the face. I left and my car had been towed. Worst night ever.
great! i almost saw a gas station fight, and i believe i became the first person to successfully pee and puke in a bathtub simultaneously
we've had our differences but let's set them aside, go home and fuck
making a list of all the places we've peed. separate list of places we peed when we were stoned
I don't really know how to explain this place...it's like I feel like I need an std just to fit in
Regardless of the amount of alcohol you may consume tonight - DON'T take anybody home
Don't worry, I'm preparing for tonight by lining my purse with a garbage bag.
Dude, it's not gay. It's winter.
Going to jail was so much more fun than I thought it would be. I feel like I walked away with more than just a bomb-ass mugshot, I feel like I made some life long friends.
Celebratory bar crawl?
If I just skip sleeping, does hangover still happen? Gonna try it. Will report back. StTAND BY
I don't know what's wrong with me. The guy from bar rescue is making me horny
I saw a penis covered in glitter tonight.
Randomize
