Maybe I lied like you did about your herpes.
how do u look a man in the eye when u own both his daughters V-Cards?
Do you know a sam ****, im at the bar right now and lookin for some dirt on her to guilt trip her in to sex
I can't believe he would be such an ass
Your boobs are way too big for you to be worrying about anything.
I can't believe I just compared my penis to a St. Bernard.
a small fire erupted but we put it out with a can of beer so everything's fine
I'm doing lines by myself in the kitchen. I think your outside. yeah that's you. your naked.
The camera shows a viking with a white mask, a creepy green guy, a gorilla, and a pumpkin throwing eggs and laundry detergent in his yard
OHHH and there was a Batman too.
currently waiting for her to check in on Facebook, the second she does I'm there. someone is getting laid tonight
I'm not stalking, she is pretty much begging me to come find her if she checks in
In order to save time, dignity and liver damage, wanna get naked?
I'm a girl who met my last three bfs in gay clubs. Think I'm doing something wrong?
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
Who knew removing piercings would be so radical?
Its like a glacier coming out of my asshole.
Randomize
