sorry if i was weird last night, had weird deja vu that we had done that before, i mean with the peanut butter.
we had.
well that explains the rash. i dont think i should see you again.
fuck your aforementioned shoe
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
I feel like I've been slapped by Gods icy cold dick of vengeance.
the taxi driver actually pulled over to let us moon a house full of people
Just had a thought: were the sirens on when we were in the ambulance?
Just did lines off your face, congrats on getting in the magazine bro
So apparently we dropped beers outside the apartment last night, and someone RETURNED them! Ha like what? I just walked out the front door to Christmas in a box on my doorstep.
Think about if the incredible hulk and king kong had a retarded baby. That's the sound she made in my ear the entire time I fucked her.
Is everyone touching their nose at me a sign that I should stop snorting vicodin off my phone in the bathroom at school?
He brought her home and fucked her in a gingerbread man costume in a cardboard rapunzel castle. He had a pretty good night.
I didn't want to leave, I wanted to move into his ass
I walked in and saw her crying and singing to her dog
My lease is up and I've been thinking, it's only fair that the guys I've fucked in this apartment in the past year help me move. They enjoyed the bed, now help me move it.
he looks like the poster child for myspace how the hell does he have other hoes?
Randomize
