She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
i think 'regret' was last night's theme. i could taste it in my mouth and woke up next to it.
you ran into the room and announced "I JUST FUCKED HER IN THE ASS". apparently you forgot she left the bedroom 5 minutes before you and was standing with us all.
When i light up a cigarette people look at of like i'm going to pee on their children.
I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
That reminds me...we need to get swords
98% is good enough for me. Kinda like birth control. Worth the risk
After being his wingman last night, I've decided I will never talk about becoming a lesbian ever again. Picking up chicks is way too hard.
Pretty sure my body is in shock, I shouldn't feel this ok after last nite.
No more morning sex. Just for once, my vagina would like to go to work bone-dry and bone-free.
He was super stoned and then he compared doing meth to having anal sex and told me to "ride that cowboy." The cowboy being my ex.
Wall of shame with a backpack full of beer bottles, cowboy hat in hand, and a handlebar mustache. I was applauded by a passing car
I could have been on my second lucrative divorce by now, but nooooo, I had to be a strong independent woman.
All I did today was eat pizza and use my vibrator.
You drank whiskey for 9 hours and did not eat anything.Nothing good was going to come from that.
Randomize
