wouldn't it be funny if when girls shaved their vaginas, they gave them sideburns?
Dude. Creed is coming in september.
We're no longer friends.
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
He kept saying "this is a bad idea" wasn't in his vocabulary. He left at 2 came back at 6 eating frozen waffles and he had a symbol, a moped mirror, and a new MacBook. I'd say he had a good time
Just found a "how to get laid" book on the dresser and am now a victim of method number 16 corollary 7.
Guy next to me at the plasma center is high and watching porn on his itouch. I am wayy to hung over for this level of poor.
DO NOT EAT ONE OF DONOVANS WEED RICE CRISPIES. I REPEAT DO NOT EAT IF YOU VALUE YOUR EYE BALLS
Also while I am being the bigger person I plan on bringing over something strong smelling and/or alcoholic to torture the poor hungover bastard
Things I learned last night: 1. Bacardi 151 is a one-way ticket to the toilet, 2. It is possible for a human being to turn into Mount Vesuvius
I went down on her for 35 minutes and didn't even get a handy. I've never felt more desire to be gay in my life.
We're listening to space jam. This can only be a good omen.
Wow I got tittyfucked by the American Dream
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
I'm sorry but it's something you and your A cups wouldn't understand.
When he busted out the ketchup I got the hell out of there. It got really creepy really fast.
Randomize
