don't get me wrong, i like my boss a lot, but not enough to not bang his daughter
My life would be so much easier if i could just ride around in the cash cab all day
i wanted to sleep on a waterbed so i filled up my bathtub so i could fall asleep in it...
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
I think im gonna have to stop sexting on the metra. The middle aged businessman behind me just leaned over and whispered 'dirty girl' and highfived his seatmate.
bad decision saturdays are such a good decision
ya she's here .. it looks like she just gave up and passed out on the floor
Do you think a former stripper/heroin addict constitutes as a high risk sexual partner?
I wish you would just come have sex with me in ihop. I don't want to be here
I gave up trying to understand them years ago. Now I'm just trying to fuck them.
If tits could talk, mine would be bragging
So I woke up really sad and then I looked in the cabinet and there was weed and now I'm not sad anymore
He was really cute! And I know but it's just like getting my fix ya know? He's basically a human vibrator.
This sucks! All of the twenty something dick I was getting went home when the university closed
All I heard was "sit on my face" "okay" and muffled screaming. I'm still disappointed.
Randomize