I had sex with billy mayes last night. HE KEPT IN CHARACTER THE WHOLE TIME.
Isn't the perk of being in a relationship not having to put in effort for sex?
So one buddy got tackled at the urinals by national guard members and was arrested. Another had sex in a port o potty with possibly the drunkest girl I've ever encountered. The rest of us blacked out and won a few bets. So yes, the derby did meet our expectations.
He went around feeding all the high kids pretzels. He's like their god now
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
did we decide the 'sorry about the threesome' cake was too flippant?
I was ready to fuck him until he pulled the "I might be bi curious" card. Now its turned into a guilt fuck. It's like he's a 3rd world child in need of a sexual orientation.
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
Texas State Troopers call you ma'am even when they arrest you for public nudity and after you've puked on their cruiser. Country boys raised right.
You're a waste of cheezeits
i wasnt sure i had a crush on her until i woke up this morning and saw i had googled fifteen variations of "lesbian marriage in estonia". where the fuck is estonia
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
we didn't even throw knives this time! it was just the carrot peeler
Breakfast sounds amazing but can we do IHOP instead? I have to pick up a Plan B pill and there’s a CVS next to it
Randomize
