i kno its fucked up..but id rather sleep it off than seek medical attention right now
I fucked her on my hockey bag. it doesnt get any more Canadian than that.
Took it a bit far last night. While leaving his house, I sent myself a text that said, 'you're still pretty"
For your information i will be shotgunning whiskey on may 21st.
Oh my God, that is a gorgeous man. And I wasn't even gay until five minutes ago.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
I totally forgot about finals week. im the worst adderall salesman ever.
I like how zombie Abe Lincoln and hooking up with a girl were on your same thought process.
Stormed out of the house in frustration and now I'm in public and have to take a rage dump. Today sucks.
The other night he asked if I had a condom and I said I had an IUD. and he goes OMG A BOMB?
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
We left him in some bushes a few blocks down toward campus. Did he find his way home?
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
There's a Russian superstition that you'll spend your year the way you celebrate New Year's, so I'm honestly not that surprised you're drunk.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
Randomize