Why don't you ever send me any naked pics
My farts woke her up so I pretended to be keep sleeping.
ask if his dick looks like a sausage. alex's bro told me that's a sure sign. btw took pain pills. maybe shouldn't listen to me.
:)
Wipe that smile off your face.
i don't want you to think of me as your TA
They call it the Collection Couch because all 4 room mates have slept with at least 3 different girls on it. He tried to seal the deal with "would you like to be number 14?"
And sadly I did.
Oh, I made pasta salad in the throw up bowl. I hope you don't need that for the next few days.
So I'm drinking wine and watching Thumbelina
I'm teaching my cat to play fetch
Yep, it's a friday
No more drinking with Em. She was on the ground so much she looked like she belongs in a lifealert commercial
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
That makes 14 Xmas cards already! Middle aged people are really nice to their dealers.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
Help I accidentally unlocked this guy's tragic backstory and I need a rewind button!
why yes, bad decisions will be made starting at 3PM Thurs through 8PM on Sun. You have been warned. Plan accordingly.
Randomize
