I think you should know he took my pants (buttons and zippers included) and my thong off with his mouth alone. I found my husband
you should have heard her the other night. no sentence related to one preceding it. it was like she was in etch a sketch and when she moved she forgot everythin
So me and friend just finished Eiffel towering this girl and sounds great in theory but after the high five has commenced its just a weird threesome especially when you make eye contact with your buddy during the session
the last three girls i tried to get with all believed in abstinence... i think gods trying to keep me from being a father
i think girls just don't want to fuck you
just chugged some gatorade and threw it up. todays gonna be awesome
I don't know what I should tell you tell you. I don't want to encourage you to dye my dog.
Fucking finally I'm about to die from sobriety over here
Also, any YOLOwl-related sex photos will result in you winning ten orgasms, courtesy of myself, as well as sweets and bacon-based dinner. All entrants welcome
Holy high batman
The hairdryer was like a fuckin obstacle course
Dude, where are you?
In back
of car
... whose car?
I really should have gone with the man who kept offering me cocaine. Why did I chose the German!? STUPID!
Most tragic bathtub-fart of all time. I am going to be late.
must go to store soon wiping with panty liner ugh
Now i know i wasnt that drunk... So why are there texts of me volunteering for a nude photo shoot for an art major student?
I was high as fuck laying down in the back seat while she gave him head. Most awkward chill moment of my life.
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