never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
So I have $4.22 in my bank account, just wrote a check for a tooth brush from quikmart, and bought a 25 cent condom from the bathroom. i don't know whats more sad, my bank account or the fact that i'm entrusting my entire future to a condom machine that was probably last filled in 1970
she kept yelling 'call me bella'
he used a semicolon in his bootycall text, of course he's not gonna go down on me.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
the threesome consisted of him fingering dana while i laid next to them watching how i met your mother.
This is going to be a 3 day beach sex fest. Do you understand
She has a lazy eye!
My other option is a hardwood floor
I love spring semester, so many high school girls visiting that think I'm the sexiest man alive just because I'm in college
Aren't you gay?
IT'S NICE TO FEEL WANTED DON'T RUIN THIS FOR ME
The condition was that I had to eat her out to Beethoven
There will always be a place in my black heart for him because he gave me my first sex-induced orgasm. While you slept on the bunk above.
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
Happy anniversary, did you sign and mail in the divorce papers yet?
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
Three cans of beer can fit in the shower catty... multi tasking
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