at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Zach says you can't see his penis until after we're married...not sure why?! Bt then he said he thinks maybe you already have on the wild animal night!
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Wow, I just sneezed gum out of my nose. Wonder how long that's been up there.
Why did you come into my room last night at 3am and pour monopoly money on me while you were crying?
Just finished putting caution tape around the tv. Sober me needs to prepare.
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
Did I get stoned on a sunday afternoon and speak to someone on the phone for an hour about cats and their behaviour? Glad you asked. And yes.
Nick is about to bring home a woman who is 39, a mother, and, by all accounts, FUCKING HOMELESS. Will update as details become available.
I don't know what to say to that. All I know is my vagina is trying to jump through the phone.
He started a convo with me by saying that we went to high school together and then recommended I try meth.
I've discovered my ability to crush a man's ego is greater than my hate for beer.
Tbh I fell asleep cuddling a bag of Brazilian nuts. Franzia never dissappoints me
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
Drunk field day, hangover yoga and sober archery practice
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