I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
just ate frosted cheerios in coffee with some marshmellows. the college diet begins
the date was going great.. until he pulled down his pants and asked if there was any hair in between his cheeks.
my wrists were so small for the handcuffs, i could slip them off and hand the tow truck driver my keys....
Why do i even want him? It's like his dick is a trophy and I need to put it on my wall of shame.
They made the rule if I caught the ball with my cleavage they would drink the entire beer pong table. I don't think they expected me to actually do it.
I didn't ask to see his penis, it was an ambush. Impressive though
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
Is there a polite way to say "Sorry for your head injury but I still want to hook up"?
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
I fell into a manhole last night, so there's that
Was the picture of her twerking on a fake plant sufficient?
I couldn't even tell you how many times I've said "wrong hole" today
she grabed my junk and started making lightsaber noises
I wonder if you could get her in a metal bikini
You kissed my hand and then put a Taco in it. Why WOUDNT I leave my husband?
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