so my class lasted 15 minutes this morning because this kid puked all over himself..only at radford
is it bad that listening to the rabbi's wife talk about how we should only be with one person is making me really, really horny for no string attached sex
I think it was the chocolate body paint and awesome blowjob that finally made us official.
all nice guys are gay and all hot ones are assholes
You're fat. Stop making excuses
I don't care if the man pisses on teenage girls, he's enchanting.
Did you know there's no emoticon to really tell you that I just consumed a magic brownie?
What's the most polite way to say "Congrats on losing weight, but no one is happy your boobs got smaller."
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I couldn't tell you were laughing too hard
Dude I thought I set my hair on fire. I wasn't laughing I was screaming.
I finally got out of bed at 8:30pm and my little brother informed me that I had cereal stuck to my back. I'm going to smoke a cigarette and go back to sleep.
I have no idea. He was just running around wearing a horse mask yelling "bumfuck" repeatedly. We figured we'd just let him get it out of his system.
It wasn't even dirty talking, it was more like the soothing gentle nonsense noises you make when you've spooked a horse.
Why is there never any toilet paper at his apartment? What does he wipe his ass with? WHAT DOES HE WIPE IT WITH?!?
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
Randomize
