I painted my nails silver
And what are the implications of that?
Is there supposed to be a msg in that? Just thought ud like to know it looks like I fingerbanged an alien
So he says he needs "alone time" a day that he doesnt have to deal with anyone. should i be concerned?
I think in guy language thats " Im fucking someone else and dont want u catching me"
just accidentally masturbated with tiger balm. best. accident. ever.
I think misery doesn't even think of me as company anymore. I'm an unofficial roommate.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
I was just on craigslist and saw and ad for a naked yoga instructor. I will no longer be jobless.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
This is the guy I made out with and it made me think of my dad. Let's never talk about it again.
When I woke up next to him on the living room floor, my glasses were broken and it felt like someone rubbed a cactus all over my vag
After last night I never want to be in the back of a cop car again. No leg room.
Just sold our expired ticket for a free night of bowling to a drunk guy downtown for 50 bucks. Ill buy beer on my way home
This may sound strange but do you have my pants?
You tried to trade them for some girls skirt... So she has them...
I just fucked her boyfriend. Happy birthday, bitch.
Can I say it was a great night out of town? Fucking my co-worker in the hotel bed while my best friend is fucking his friend on the floor and a random guy is laying in the other bed meanwhile we are all passing a joint back and forth
On cleanup... i've counted 94 solo cups so far.. oh, and i found a miniature top hat in the microwave
Randomize
