hell yes lets make some ravioli
He still wants to giggity, regardless of his girlfriend. So...I guess I'm happy again.
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
She made me go with her to get a pregnancy test since she's missed a few birth control pills. She made me park in the "expectant mothers" spot at CVS and preceded to ask if it would be in the pest control section.
I miss old school porno. There just isn't any love in porn these days.
This girl told me she was a virgin the other day. I felt like I was talking to a unicorn.
Haha. We better find him. He looked like he came out of Switzerland's vagina, he's that much of a blonde beauty.
there was so much ham clogging the tub drain.. he said it was ok he has a cleaning lady
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
You carried me up the stairs after I told you not to. And what did you tell me? "Let me test my strengths."
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
I have just found the cubicle of sustenance. And I will rejoice at all the families that have not found this magic. This vodka cubicle of magic.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
i solemnly vow to never stick my penis into crazy again
I give it a week.
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
Randomize
