i miss vodka and anonymity. college is so rich in both. in college we are a many armed creature, lubricated with beer and sex.
No, I'm a firm believer in "Swallow or it isn't love."
he said he "kind of had sex before.. Barely" i think it was one of those situations where you slide into home and get tagged out.
You tried to pay the bartender in graduation checks, I think you'll be fine in the real world.
She had a maple leaf tattoo behind her ear and told me she liked my "playoff beard".
Only in Canada would your laziness be applied to hockey and rewarded.
Only mom could turn an abortion day into a shopping day
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
She is ok w me having sex for money. Just gotta find rich grandmas.
When I realised he had a girlfriend I just started telling them about my ex and how I write poetry about him. Which I then read to them. They just gave me pity looks and left me to finish my spliff alone.
I literally used, "MY VAGINA IS TOO FANTASTIC FOR HIM TO STAY GAY" as a valid argument for attempting to fuck my gay friend.
I hope you gays don't get too crazy after DOMA. Gay divorces aren't any better than straight ones.
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
SOMETIMES YOU HAVE TO BLAST VANESSA CARLTON IN YOUR CAR AT MIDNIGHT TO FEEL AGAIN. IDK.
All I wanted was a couple of orgasms before work, is that too much to ask?!
I hate when pretentious people talk bad ab corn dogs
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