You know it's time to leave Spain when you are back and forth between Skype and a Spanish dictionary trying to figure out out to say "I can still smell you on my skin."
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
I'm just not sure how to initiate the "do you want to have sex with my boyfriend and I" conversation
the world took limewire and four lokos away from me in one week....hello depression
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
WHY DO SO MANY HOBOS THINK I'M CUTE.
there's a girl in the coffee shop just eating a pint of ben & jerry's
SMART GIRL
We jumped on a random trolley because total strangers offered us free vodka. We're not even on the route map as far as I can tell. I see now how those people died in "Hostel"... we deserve whatever happens to us tonight.
Dude, he threw a pool chair off of an 8 story building. It was a successful night I'd say.
Having to grow a landing strip to cover the bruises from pole dancing. Thanks for the birthday present, but next time, maybe just a gift card?
On a scale of one to liver failure, how bad would it be if I played thunderstruck alone?
Dude the little bong I just got fits nicely in the cup holder in my car. The gods approve of my habits.
The moment I said this burrito on my nuts feels really good is the moment I knew I was drunk
Just took acid. Wish me luck.
I worked out twice today and you're dropping acid. My life sucks.
Jus pulled over and stole. Corn out of a. Field. ... get on my level
Randomize
