do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
if you call bong hits and onion rings a party, then yeah
so when I got there he was dressed as jesus in a recliner drinking whiskey out of the bottle watching spanish porn. Then kept shouting dont judge me or ill judge you. we didn't even go to a halloween party.
there is just no excuse for touching your mothers vagina.
She jerked me off while she drove us back from Denver going 70mph. It was both the scariest and most erotic moment of my life.
I can count the number of hours she's been sober this weekend on one hand.
I know your texting costs money, but I'll pay for it if you consider this. Oversized frozen jello shots. I'll buy everything needed if you approve. Let me know
Half of my brain feels like I donated it to science and they basically just poured jack Daniels on it and put out cigarettes into it before returning it to my skull
He might not have any marketable talents, but the kid dry humps like no other.
We set around a table in a hotel room and he spoon fed Molly to everyone there... I felt sketch for sec but then... Oh well.
I gave up great shower sex to be here so don't say I never did anything for our friendship.
It's not "nice." It's the supermodel of dicks.
Pretty penis doesn't make up for awkward eye contact.
Just did coke off my highschool yearbook. Not much has changed in 5 years.
I wonder how vigorously I can jack off in a one person tent without being noticed???
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