We're pretty sure the 'pocket' aspect of the hot pocket is unnecessary. Testing our theory now.
It totally doesn't make me a groupie if I hooked up with him before he was in the Olympics
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
I just saw that cheerleader from u of arkansas that I hooked up with over spring break on espn. My parents would be so proud.
The only thing worse than being hungover is being hungover and not able to open your mouth wide enough to eat a cheeseburger
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I need you to know that everytime my toddler does the downward facing dog in the nude I think about the night you and your dude fell in love.
I cut myself stripping on your car. Probably a profession I shouldn't pursue
Ooo, yeah! Thanksgiving will be a blast. Can't fuckin wait for the next round of "have you found a nice young man yet?" Followed by a lovely helping of "don't worry, there's someone out there for you."
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
So I'm getting really old. I feel asleep for a booty call that I initiated. The struggle is real.
Now you can NEVER tell anyone that on thanksgiving I took a selfie of my pussy to prove they don't get worse with babies.
She was drunk, dancing on the table. Until the table leg completely broke off and she fell on the ground and broke her front tooth straight off. Worse news is there making her pay for the table
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Randomize
