i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
i don't know her name but she is cooking me brkfst then helpin me find my car.
she hot?
i don't wanna talk about it
I'm walking behind a man wearing a womans shirt, heels, mens pants and a baseball hat
I basing my decision on whether or not to date someone on whether I could imagine having sex with them sober
I figured it out. hungover me hates drunk me, drunk me hates sober me, and sober me hates being sober. so yes, were blacking out tonight.
He noticed there was ketchup on his shirt and took it off. Noticed there were people there and put it back on. Then he saw the ketchup again. He must have taken his shirt on and off about 6 times
Hes sobering up now. He was just really bad for like 45 minutes. He cried while he was telling me how he pictured us eating hotdogs on the beach together..
at some point i feel off my bar stool straight into the arms of a gay guy. just my luck.
I'll be accepting presents in the forms of drinks, drugs, and orgasms. So any or all of those will be fine.
There was a sweat stain in the shape of a fast chick with low standard on your bathroom floor
Only he would come to a strip club and talk about an internship with Walt Disney during a lap dance.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I think we did. All i know my pants smell like pong water due to the bathroom extravagansa. God I feel like a whore.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
Waiting on the notification from my fitness pal that tells me I'm an alcoholic
Randomize
