dude, you're never picky with who you hook up with, have a little dignity
nah man, chicks are like pokemon, gotta catch \'em all
I asked her if she had any t-shirts of bands that didn't suck. I got a Sublime shirt and my answer.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
Yeah, you went up to him and said "I stare at people until they feel obligated to talk to me."
Body shots with my MILFs MILF!!
All I did was send my mom an ecard
Sorry, fell into some ass. Call you tomorrow.
I bought a box of wine on my way home. I figured if I’m going to be broke during the holidays, I might as well be able to drink about it.
i have a strong feeling that today will be a naked day for me...i don't feel like doing shit
See I am maturing. I just got in from my DRIVE of shame......
shit i just threw up on a freshman
i don't know if i should laugh or feel bad..
nevermind it was a sophmore, laugh.
I remember you banged her while I was dying on your couch, so good call
OMG OMG OMG!!!! I made his penis bleed!! I repeat I MADE HIS PENIS BLEED!!!!
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
