3:12 am: but i thought i was coming over tonight, don't fall asleep i wore new underwear
Any of you guys fuck a 16 year old again? Because our front yard got fucked over high school style.
I just had a girl text me from knoxville "come see me. we'll go for drinks and I can make you breakfast"
how do you like your eggs?
over tits
I'm not really sure how I got home, but judging by this headache, i'm assuming it involved bourbon.
I think my plan to not drink this week was just ruined by my mothers discovery of the chat function on facebook
The musician playing at the bar just puked inside his acoustic guitar, then sang an encore performance. I love Louisa!!!!
look. either you want to have late night naked sleep overs or you don't. do not involve dinner and extraneous conversations in this relationship.
I have vodka and 50 pizza rolls best spring break ever
Of all of my friend's husbands, I like when yours hits on me best
Awe that means so much to us
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
I don't just want drugs. I deserve drugs.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
there is a tent in the living room. its a vip tent room. i want in.
I think we might need a safe word for this...
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
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