I love how girls just decide that guys who don't like them must be gay
I do the same thing. If a girl doesn't like me...I am like, "i must be gay"
so while we were having sex, he stuck it in my but, and when he finished he goes next time can we have anal. i don't know if that means im tight or my butt hole is loose, i choose to think the first one
He just said "Chunky" very loudly in his sleep.
I just passed on expense account drinking, this must be the worst hangover ever.
I've only left my bed to pee and eat nutella out of the jar with my fingers
My mom's 50 year old alcoholic friend just told me about how she was more whoreish then us at our age. Challenge accepted.
stuck in the elevator with that hot guy from the 3rd flood. Worried he can smell my spray tan and desperation
Mystery solved. Def had ice creme last night. There is a melted half eaten ice creme bar next to the bed. Which had melted onto my pillow. That explains why it was in my hair too. Im a fucking sherlock holmes over here.
I feel like the devil slapped me in the face with his dick.
Birthday success
Will the fact that I have 4 boob hickies add to or take away from tonight's outfit?
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
Also just throwing this out there I don't think anyone who brings another girl back to your bed to share with you can qualify as a frigid bitch
I'm sun burnt so instead of getting drunk and trying to sleep with you, how about we get naked and you scratch my body and rub lotion on me while I rub one out?
Do you think casino weekend will remind us once again that we in fact are not mature enough to be this old?
I just watched will sing pure imagination from willy wonka and then blow a banana
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