Midget sex pt 2 tonight
btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
I swear that men would be more efficient if they had a semen gauge on their penises
True friendship; bangin a girl to get ur friends hat back
Just coerced a Santa to buy me a handle. Tis the season.
I don't understand how she could dump me AFTER we had shower sex. I'm fucking great at shower sex
I think I'm interested in anyone that recognizes I actually have a pulse
He bought my favorite ceral.. I've guess I've earn the status as one of his regular fuck buddies. I feel honored and proud. His roommates girls don't get this treatment.
We'll I told him I wanted to keep it PG last night, but then later I asked him to take his pants off. So i'm guessing it was my fault.
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
I think I shall call his penis Gatsby. We talk about it all the time, but I never see it.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
"We drove to the deserted part of the parking lot, and that's where we blew each other. It was so romantic."
I have betrayed my no carb ways & I can feel it.
Embrace it. Come over to the dark side. I'll feed you muffins while stroking your hair.
whenever dudes said you had nice tits you'd scream at them "This double push-up bra is full of deceit and lies!"
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