I'm half single.
Please tell me it's the bottom half.
You have more facebook pictures than most towns have people.
I love my penis, it thinks for me sometimes
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
I'm not holding out much hope. She met me in a nighclub when I was arguing with the cigarette machine
i just shaved my vag. i figure it gave me about ten more minutes to drink tomorrow.
Between the walk of shame, bar fight, karaoke, injuries, number of bar check-ins, and variety/quantity of alcohols and Advil consumed, I'd say HookerFest 2012 was a raging success.
all I'm saying is that my epic blow jobs have made grown professional football players cry in ecstasy
Jill you already won the game by finding a dude who will fuck you in flamingo knee socks. Theres no hope for the rest of us
I just had a very enlightening conversation with my hat. we need more of whatever the fuck that was.
Just took adderall with about half a bottle of red wine...i have stopped trying for this last exam
And you were like wow I love water shots they taste so good
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
i had every intention of working out now im just drinking wine and thinking about taking nudes in my thigh high tube socks
Not having a reliable dick in is getting expensive. I’ve had to replace 3 vibrators since Mike and I split up
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