As long as they suck a good dick I don't care what fruit they have and where they have it
I just spent my lunch hour driving around campus yelling "TRADE LIVES WITH ME!" to all the freshmen moving in
NBC reported that a group almost has enough signatures to submit pole dancing as an Olympic sport in 2016...
God I fucking love America.
I think the boy in my gender studies class cried when 90% of the girls said they had faked an orgasm
that's not even the weird part though. he already knew where the bathroom was, he might have been here before..
and my attempt at hiding my drunkness from my parents included walking into the wall as soon as they let me into the house.
I tried to show my boob for free volcano tacos at taco bell last night. Not boobs. Just boob. The manager wasn't allowing it.
Wait..I think something else did happen last night my vagina is too pleased for this level of hangover..
4 people stoned, 3 boys I've slept with, 2 I gave chlamydia, and a partridge in a pear treeeeee
How festive
Someone is giving away free yogurt on craigslist. Can I get a ride?
making my breakfast out of the pot brownies we made last night. Safe to say it's time to go grocery shopping.
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
Pretty sure I got pink eye from the strip club. There is also still beer cans rattling around in my shower.
I just named someones junk. I should not be allowed to talk to people.
We're getting a bucket of chicken and screwing around, so no, you can't join us.
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