I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
I look like a poor person in the cast of Gay Oliver.
I Apparently saved a picture of the Eiffel tower in between 2 pics of his dick. It appears to be the same size. I fucking love Paris.
beware of the wheat thins...there might be a knife in it
Screw it. I'll show up in a white dress with a sign that says " I fucked the groom and it wasn't that great."
I need to stop drunkenly getting naked. I'm losing all my favorite party clothes.
Just found a note from Saturday that says "rainy soft hair".... Any ideas?
They reenacted the scene from the lion king where mufasa talked to simba from the clouds. As high as they were they got it word for word. There has to be an award for that.
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I smelled him yesterday and almost relapsed he's like cocaine
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
i didnt realize that your first thought would be SEXUALIZING BREAD
Just sent a nude with the caption "seasons greetings from our family to yours"
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