Fake titties should be able inflate and deflate like tires. So on Saturday you can put on your Double D hooker titties or Sunday put on your size B church tits.
I just saw a girl wearing a flannel shirt that would make 1992 cringe
you think it's bad that I have four different guys toothbrushes in my bathroom?
Were not really friends so much as I suck his dick a lot
Yeah, it was all fun and games until I realized that it wasn't my tent, and I had no idea who those people were
Dorm room. In. Elevator. Fell in. Boom. Puke
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
had a dream you helped me fill my shoes with yogurt. we were even like "why didn't we think of this before?!" like it was just so obvious
that sounds like something we'd do... we're onto something here
I'm studying. And by studying I mean I am laying on my floor drinking boones farm alone. Last two weeks. Fuck it.
Just banged your ex. So it really is 'him, not you' in that he's gay. Rodeo champion gay.
Got a high five from a Superman stripper tonight
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
MY GUT IS TELLING ME YES AND SO IS MY VAGINA
He jerked off some dude with a slice of Wonder Bread.
The sports guy?
Yeah. They claimed the bread made it hetero
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