HOLD UP I think she only has eight fingers...
at a bonfire and someone threw a plastic cup in the fire. everyone immediately stopped what they were doing to yell collectively at him about what he was doing to the environment, then went back to drinking
only in oregon
Prostitute standing on the corner thrusting at cars as they drive by. New marketing strategy?
When I came home you were watching infomercials, eating croutons out of the box and salsa from a funnel. Well done.
Kinda felt bad though cuz she whimpered and shuttered a lot, i felt like i was kicking a puppy, only the puppy liked it and came a bunch
I bought canned wine on a clearance aisle at the liquor store... I feel like I'm living in an episode of It's Always Sunny.
Were betting on little kids falling and racing for a drinking game at the wedding.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
Freedom, beauty, truth, and love to all. I also probably have syphilis
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
Hey sorry about last night. can I come pick up my tooth?
The sex was so good I feel like I could run a triathlon, hit big at the casino, and defeat ISIS.
Normally roommates threatening each other with knives would be too much crazy for me, but I don't have much going on right now and I feel like this could get interesting. So I think I'm gonna ride this shit out for a while.
Sooo I ended up ugly crying at the drive thru window at 10 pm last night....how was your valentine's day?
Well what did you order
He and his ex stood there talking about going to get Chinese food while I was half naked searching for my panties
Randomize
