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oh my god, i just wanna eat cake off your dick
i feel like im doing the pre-walk of shame..like every car that drives by is like, ooooo look at that girl, in that itty bitty dress, yep shes about to get her skank on tonight...
i want to fuck
?
it's pretty self explanatory
I can't go out tonight I need to save my money for important things.....like rogaine and ecstasy.
i have a dinosaur tramp stamp
Her birthday cake consisted of a shot of tequila with a candle in it
she gave me a blowjob during our lunchbreak and expected me not to tell people
...But it's not like we would be the first people to pay for an abortion with student loans and cell phone rebates.
I just woke up tangled in fishing line while wearing someone else's bathing suit with fishes drawn all over me. What kind of sex did we have?
Her idea of a bathing suit is... well.. she might not actually even know what one is. I've only ever seen her in a pool drunk and fully clothed or attempting to get into a pool but tripping over her pants which are at her ankles. Drunk.
I am watching xfiles and eating microwaved cookiedough, and I see nothing wrong with it.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
Mom is so high she had to turn off the ceiling fan because it was going too fast and it freaked her out.
summer in europe = liver of steel
I accept that challenge.
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