You're so nebulous sometimes
u cheatin on me?
if i did i would try to upgrade babe.
i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
There's a group of australian girls next to me. can't take them seriously. think they are going to turn into mr g
My ferret is drunk. Someone told me you'd know what to do?
I'm going to buy you a pony but under one condition: you have to name it sarah jessika parker
quit making up holidays to get me to go drinking with you
oh and speaking of men I've slept with. Ryan lost 1/3 of a testicle zip lining
From what I can tell at a cursory glance, it seems that last night I fell asleep on string cheese and it melted into my bra.
I think the paper my teacher just handed back to me had one of his pubes on it, I'm way too hungover for this
I would have publicly shamed him but I'm pretty sure his tramp stamp did that on its own...
That edible kicked in right as I was upside-down on that rollercoaster. Fucking.mind.blown.
You stared at a Swedish dude for like 5 minutes then asked him "shouldn't you be yelling at dragons"
I couldn't figure out what was more important, finishing the shot or putting out the fire on my leg.
How much of a thot would I be if I put this pic up? On a scale of thot-ish to Queen of Thotlandia
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