When we talk. Remind me of these topics, photoshop, my bday, threesomes, and cherekee indians. I swear these are real topics...
New topics to add when we talk, sweden, boxing, and the band journey
It's official. Every guy I've slept with has been to jail.
I just saw fred flintstone in my fruity pebbles!
what drugs are you on?
none, cept for the pain medication i got prescribed by the doc: it said 2 pills every 3 hours, but I took 6 cuz i'll be away from home later
mom brought her knitting needles with her. its bad enough to be in the ER on new years, but to be with the knitting parent!?
I left him a voicemail saying i went through with the abortion and he texts me back one thing... the bbm "phew" face. really?
I woke up in bed alone w 2 bite marks on my boob... Salt and pepper shakers In my purse along w a bottle of steak sauce.... The drunkasauraus has struck again
He told me he wanted to show me something beautiful, then just started peeing off the bridge into oncoming traffic
I was to tired to jerk him off, so he made me hold it while he thrusted into my hand.
What do you need? A swimsuit and a liver of steel? What else?
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
she texted me 'with freud,' which i thought was drunk for 'i'm with my friend.' but nope, she was actually on a statue of the psychologist sigmund freud.
She said she didn't know what fireball was. We are no longer friends.
His front door was open but I INSISTED on army crawling FOOT FIRST under the garage door. Then I peed the bed.
And why in he fuck did I get 'dick' in Romanian tattooed on my forearm
Sorry 4 always trying to rope you into my sexual exploits
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