She was not exactly lady-like. Down there.
they just came back. i guess "were gonna go get dinner" means "were gonna fuck for 5 minutes at the little league field"
If a girl is wearing Ed Hardy from head to toe, does that make her a douchebagette?
He said we were driving the golf cart through the woods screaming 'iceroad truckers' for four hours in the dark
mondays should just be called national damage control day
So I guess I passed out face first on the ground while trying to grill last night
What did you wear last night? Because I'm pretty sure there are atleast 4 Facebook statuses about your walk of shame.
I'm functioning at the level of a challenged walrus.
THEY'RE. IN. YOUR. BED. THEY RANDOMLY SHOW UP. AND GET IN YOUR BED.
Also, my phone autocorrects ENABLER to all caps. I think I drunk text the word too often.
So that's all you want from me. Easy ass.
And an everlasting friendship
I'm almost too hungover to function. Got into the wrong car by mistake. there was a rotweiler in it. Thank god he was more confused than i was for a minute.
WHY ARE THE COPS ALWAYS AT DENNYS WHEN IMDRUNK!?
no its a draw, weve been through this, when were keeping score on getting laid i get a plus 1 handicap each week because of your British accent! its only fair!
Why do so many fanfic writers want to see hockey players get pregnant?
Randomize
