I'm drive I can fine osifer
Apparently I masturbate in my sleep now.
Come home. Power Hour by yourself is only fun for the first 10 minutes.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
saw a man tazing a raccoon in the middle of the street last night... normal
The forest. Magic mushrooms. Wind trees leaves sky. That is alll.
This should be a warning to men everywhere: do not send pictures of your erect penis to women you hardly know - they will add cats and send them to all of their friends.
She kept pulling joints out of her bra and asking strangers for birthday hugs.
Just out of curiosity. Did you wait until my fb picture was well liked by others before liking it so people won't know we're fucking?
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
Ice cream and condoms, solid grocery store trip
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
Do you know anyone else that comes home with unexplainable injuries as many nights a week as we do?
Okay, the good news, found Jared, all IDs accounted for, Jack is meeting us at yours with your requested the delivery. The bad news: Lost Alice, banned from Stages, possibly fucked my TA in the bathroom.
By the time I realized I was watching a Danish porno with muppets it was already too late
Randomize
